Too General Thesis Statement

Have you ever watched a great film trailer and thought, “I have to see that movie!”? A good trailer gives you the basic premise of the movie, shows you the highlights, and encourages you to want to see more.

A good thesis statement will accomplish the same thing. It gives readers an idea of the most important points of an essay, shows the highlights, and makes them want to read more.

A well-constructed thesis serves as a lighthouse for your readers, offering them a guiding light in the stormy sea of claims and evidence that make up your argumentative essay.

It will also help keep you, the writer, from getting lost in a convoluted and directionless argument.

Most importantly, a good thesis statement makes a statement. After all, it’s called a thesis statement for a reason!

“This is an interesting statement!” you want your reader to think, “Let’s see if this author can convince me.”

This blog post will dissect the components of a good thesis statement and will give you 10 thesis statement examples that you can use to inspire your next argumentative essay.

The Thesis Statement Dissected

Before I give you a blanket list of thesis statement examples, let’s run through what makes for a good thesis statement. I’ve distilled it down to four main components.

1. A good argumentative thesis is focused and not too broad.

It’s important to stay focused! Don’t try to argue an overly broad topic in your essay, or you’re going to feel confused and unsure about your direction and purpose.


Don’t write, “Eating fast food is bad and should be avoided.”

This statement is too general and would be nearly impossible for you to defend. It leaves a lot of big questions to answer. Is all fast food bad? Why is it bad? Who should avoid it? Why should anyone care?

Do write, “Americans should eliminate the regular consumption of fast food because the fast food diet leads to preventable and expensive health issues, such as diabetes, obesity, and heart disease.”

In this example, I’ve narrowed my argument to the health consequences related to a diet of fast food. I’ve also chosen to focus on Americans rather than everyone in the universe. (Because, as we all know, inhabitants of the faraway planet Doublepatty 5 require the starches and fats inherent in fast food to survive).

2. A good argumentative thesis is centered on a debatable topic.

Back in the ‘80s, teens loved to say “that’s debatable” about claims they didn’t agree with (such as “you should clean your room” and “you shouldn’t go to that movie”). This age-old, neon-colored, bangle-wearing, peg-legged wisdom holds true today—in your thesis statement.

Don’t write, “There are high numbers of homeless people living in Berkeley, California.”

No one can argue for or against this statement. It’s not debatable. It’s just a fact.

An argument over this non-debatable statement would go something like this:

“There are lots of homeless people in Berkeley.”

“Yes, there sure are a bunch of them out there.”

“Yup.”

As you can see, that’s not much of an argument.

Do write, “Homeless people in Berkeley should be given access to services, such as regular food donations, public restrooms, and camping facilities, because it would improve life for all inhabitants of the city.”

Now that’sdebatable.

Opponents could easily argue that homeless people in Berkeley already receive adequate services (“just look at all those luxurious sidewalks!”), or perhaps that they shouldn’t be entitled to services at all (“get a job, ya lazy loafers!”).

3. A good argumentative thesis picks a side.

I went into a lot of detail about the importance of picking sides in my post The Secrets of a Strong Argumentative Essay. Picking a side is pretty much the whole entire point of an argumentative essay.

Just as you can’t root for both the Yankees and the Mets, you can’t argue both sides of a topic in your thesis statement.

Don’t write, “Secondhand smoke is bad and can cause heart disease and cancer; therefore, smoking should be outlawed in public places, but outlawing smoking is unfair to smokers so maybe non-smokers can just hold their breath or wear masks around smokers instead.”

A wishy-washy statement like this will make your reader scratch his head in puzzlement. Are you for smoking laws or against them? Yankees or Mets? Mets or Yankees?

Pick a side, and stick with it!

Then stick up for it.

Do write, “Secondhand smoke is just as harmful as smoking and leads to a higher prevalence of cancer and heart disease. What’s worse, people who inhale secondhand smoke are doing so without consent. For this reason, smoking in any public place should be banned.”

4. A good thesis makes claims that will be supported later in the paper.

As I explained in my blog post How to Create a Powerful Argumentative Essay Outline, Your claims make up a critical part of building the roadmap to your argument.

It’s important to first include a summary of your claims in your thesis statement. During the course of your essay, you will back each of your claims with well-researched evidence.

Don’t write, “Humans should relocate to Mars.”

This statement doesn’t include any supporting claims. Why should humans move to Mars? What are the benefits of moving to a planet without oxygen or trees?

Do write, “It is too late to save earth; therefore, humans should immediately set a date for their relocation to Mars where, with proper planning, they can avoid issues of famine, war, and global warming.”

This statement includes some thought-provoking claims. The reader will wonder how the author plans to defend them. (“Famine, war, and global warming can be easily avoided on Mars? Go on…”)

Now that you understand the four main components of a good thesis statement, let me give you more thesis statement examples.

10 Thesis Statement Examples

Finally, I’ve come up with 10 debatable, supportable, and focused thesis statements for you to learn from. Feel free to copy these and customize them for use in your own argumentative essays.

There are a couple of things to be aware of about the following examples:

  1. I have not done the research needed to support these claims. So some of the claims may not be useable once you dig into them.
  2. Be careful not to use these thesis statements word-for-word; I wouldn’t want you to get in trouble if your teacher did a copy/find Google maneuver on you!

#1. Why Vaccinations Should Be Mandatory

Inspired by this sample essay on vaccinations.

Today, nearly 40% of American parents refuse to vaccinate their children due to a variety of unfounded fears. Vaccinations against diseases such as polio, rubella, and mumps, should be mandatory, without exception, for all children of the U.S. who wish to attend school. These vaccinations are critical to the control and eradication of deadly infectious diseases.

#2. Government Surveillance Is Harmful

Inspired by this sample essay on government surveillance.

Government surveillance programs do more harm than good because they invade civil liberties, lead innocent people to suffer unfair punishments, and ultimately fail to protect the citizens that they are designed to safeguard. For these reasons, programs such as PRISM operated by the NSA should be discontinued.

#3 Financial Compensation for Organ Donors

Inspired by this sample essay on organ donation.

People who sign up for organ donation freely give their hearts and other organs, but this free system limits the number of available donors and makes it difficult for recipients to access lifesaving transplants. Thus, organ donors should be financially compensated to produce more available organs and, at the same time, to decrease profitable, illegal organ harvesting activities in the black market.

#4. Our School Is Too Dependent on Technology

Inspired by this sample essay on technology dependence.

Our school’s dependence on technology has caused students to lose the ability to think independently. This dependence has caused a greater prevalence of mood disorders, memory loss, and loneliness. Educators should combat these issues by requiring students to participate in regular technology detoxes.

#5 School Officials’ Should Fight Cyberbullying

Inspired by this sample essay on cyberbullying.

Bullying has extended far beyond school and into cyberspace. Even though these acts of aggression take place outside of school boundaries, school officials should have the authority to discipline students who engage in cyberbullying without fear of reprisal. Doing so will help improve the online behavior of students and decrease incidences of cyberbully-related suicide attempts.

#6 The U.S. Media Should Update the Depiction of Traditional Families

Inspired by this sample essay on families.

The U.S. media depicts the traditional family as being comprised of a mother, father, and children; however, this notion of the traditional family is outdated and can be harmful to children who look to this as the gold standard. The U.S. media should, therefore, expand and redefine the definition of the traditional American family to include divorced and remarried parents, extended families living together, and families with same-gender parents. This will increase the overall sense of happiness and well-being among children whose families don’t necessarily fit the mold.

#7 Student Loans Should Be Forgiven

Inspired by this sample essay on student loans.

Crippling student debt is stifling the growth of the U.S. economy because it inhibits graduates from being able to spend money on consumer goods and home purchases. To alleviate this, lenders should be required to forgive student loans in cases where students are unable to repay their debts. Doing so would benefit the growth of the economy by increasing tax revenues, unfreezing credit markets, and creating jobs.

#8 Marijuana Should Be Legalized

Inspired by this sample essay on legalizing marijuana.

Marijuana has numerous medical applications, such as treating symptoms of epilepsy, cancer, and glaucoma. Legalizing the use of marijuana in the U.S. will greatly benefit the medical sector by giving physicians access to this lifesaving drug.

#9 Foreign Aid to Africa Does Not Work

Inspired by this sample essay on foreign aid to Africa.

Sending foreign aid to African countries is doing more harm than good, and it should be discontinued; the practice has caused African countries to become vulnerable to inflation, currency fluctuations, corruption, and civil unrest.

#10 China’s One-Child Policy Should Be Reversed

Inspired by this sample essay on China’s one-child policy.

China’s one-child policy was intended to help control population growth. Instead, it has led to unintended and negative consequences, such as a diminishing labor force, an aging population, the neglect of basic human rights, and an unbalanced gender population. To improve China’s situation, the policy should be reversed.

Any one of these thesis statement examples will get you started on the road to writing an awesome argumentative essay. Once your essay is finished, feel free to send it to a Kibin editor who can check it for grammar, sentence structure, and the strength of your thesis.

Good luck with your essay!

Psst... 98% of Kibin users report better grades! Get inspiration from over 500,000 example essays.

The thesis statement is generally defined as one to two sentences near the beginning of a work that clearly states the main points to be argued or discussed. Exact preferences of a thesis statement, such as it being one or two sentences, or where it is placed in the paper, differs based on individual preferences- but the primary characteristics are the same. The thesis statement should assert only one concept or idea, be narrow and specific, and accurately represent the contents of the paper. Many beginning students, as well as experienced ones, find difficulty in properly constructing a thesis statement. Below are some common misunderstandings that students often encounter when formulating thesis statements.

#1

Broad, general thesis statements: A major blunder to avoid is creating a thesis statement that is too broad or too vague to be reasonably accomplished within the confines of your paper. Broad or general statements are unrealistic and hard to satisfy. Likewise, by definition, something broad does not define-and your thesis statement should clearly define your main objective along with what you hope to accomplish in your paper.

An example of a broad thesis statement is; 'Children in Europe suffer from many psychological disorders.' This thesis statement does not provide enough information to properly formulate a paper regarding it. A better thesis statement would be; 'Children in Europe suffer from many psychological disorders due to the collapse of the two-parent household and troubling familial dynamics.'

*As you can see the actual thesis statement in the second example is a bit longer than the 'bad' example that came before it. This is because a thesis statement needs to be specific and easily measurable-the first one is not.

#2

Writing a statement that is not arguable-most people would agree with it: One of the hallmarks of a proper thesis statement is that it is something than can be 'contested' or argued. Choosing a blanket, neutral statement that doesn't initiate any worthwhile discussions is another common error in essay and term paper writing. The objective of many papers is to argue a point, convince or persuade, or to inform and explain. These goals would be very hard to accomplish using neutral statements that fail to provoke a counter argument or at least considerable points to debate.

*Note that a thesis statement need not always hold a very strong opinion. As long as it is weighty enough to be thoroughly discussed and provide an intriguing or interesting argument; that should be sufficient.

#3

Including several points, rather than one main point: Because of this common mistake some people may even feel that the definition of a thesis statement as 'one or two sentences' should be restricted to just one sentence. This is because it is very easy to go overboard and complicate your thesis statement by adding too many points of analysis. In general one sentence is usually more than enough to adequately illustrate your main argument and objective.

*Its okay for your one main idea to include a few subpoints or details as needed. With the above example regarding 'Educational psychology' it can be observed that the full thesis statement in fact conveyed one idea by providing two points of discussion; 'two-parent households and troubling familial dynamics.'

#4

(a) Writing the thesis statement as a question: This simple mistake can be avoided by returning back to the term thesis statement! A statement is not a question-and though this is an obvious mistake many people still tend to fall into it. The problem often occurs when first formulating the research question. A narrow and well-structured research question will likely resemble a thesis statement in many respects. And because of this many people unfamiliar to writing research papers, for example, may end up marking their thesis statement as a question rather than a statement. This can also be better understood by knowing that the thesis statement should actually answer the research question rather than be the research question.

(b) Writing the thesis statement as a fact or observation: This concern is usually coupled with the previous one in that it goes back to the definition of a thesis statement and its intent. Since the thesis statement is an absolute and decisive one, it should clearly state a position rather than make an observation or state a fact. Many compelling observations surface throughout the course of research, as well as facts, and they all may seem like a good fit for a thesis statement. But the key thing to remember is that those statements will not accomplish the objective if they do not accurately represent what is being proven in the essay or paper.

*For example; 'Poor nutrition leads to obesity.' Whether this statement is true or not it doesn't satisfy the requirements of a thesis statement because it doesn't (a) argue a point (b) identify anything specific about the topic. A better sentence would be 'Poor nutrition as well as lack of exercise in school is the cause of obesity in American children.'

Some of the key differences in this statement is that it is very specific and can be debated or argued and can adequately be covered in a research paper. {*A counter argument perhaps would be that it is not the lack of exercise and nutrition in the schools that leads to obesity but rather its the lack of similar things in the home environment that contribute to this.}

#5

Providing too much detail and cluttering up your statement: This mistake is the opposite of the first one. Perhaps in trying to avoid writing a very broad statement, students may fall into the other extreme and provide a lengthy, filled thesis statement. This contradicts another feature which is that the thesis statement should be short and concise. Because one of its main functions is to summarize the major points of your paper or essay and in doing so should really be limited to two lines or less.

*Remember that whatever you claim to prove or analyze must be satisfied by the proofs and evidences present in your paper-so avoid overburdening yourself by setting high expectations that must be met.

The last point is a crucial one. Many people use the thesis statement as a guide and a mini-outline for their papers and essays. For that reason its best to start off with a trial thesis statement that is reasonable in size and only looks at a one or two points. This will hopefully make the burden of meeting thesis statement expectations less and provide more room for the development of ideas.

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